What do you call a dead text post?
any of yours
A text ghos-
idk how id survive without water <3
haha. i feel like that sometimes too. glad someone loves water as much as i do :)
why does sex have to result in babies why cant it result in pizza
“push, Helen! push!” she gives the last of her energy, and she hears it
the soft, tender sizzle of a freshly baked pizza
the doctor holds it up by the crust, carefully snipping off the little plastic table
“it’s a deep dish!”
what the hell is wrong with this website
We like pizza and not babies.
it’s weird how british people say “lift” instead of “elevator” and how my dad says “you are a dissappointment” instead of “i love you”
wouldn’t it be HILARIOUS if I put my education on Facebook as Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry???? wouldn’t that be so fresh???
*has a son* *names him 1k* *punches son* guys I hit 1k
If you don’t use an empty house to sing obnoxiously and off key in your underwear you are doing life wrong
*gives people advice when i cant even handle my own problems*
imagine if tumblr showed how many hours you spent on this website
jeez i would love to order that thing online, but i don’t know what size to order it in because women’s clothing sizes are determined by the alignments of the planets in relation to the fuck you galaxy
my dad just asked me why leonardo da vinci never won an oscar